Oops!

Is anyone else ever nervous when they back out of their garage? I’m always scared to death I’m going to hit something. I get that feeling in my stomach where it feels like I’ve just suddenly dropped 10 stories.

So, here’s the deal. My hubby and I take turns parking in the garage. Do we have a one-car garage? No. Embarrassingly enough, we have a 2.5 car garage. But somehow, all of our crap takes up the equivalent of 1 and a half cars! It really isn’t all that unorganized either. We have floor to ceiling shelves that line one side of the whole .5 raised side, then we need room to walk and get to the shelves. But, you do have to walk around the huge Taylor Tot-size battery-operated Hummer and the Radio Flyer wagon, because you just look at that wagon, and who can rid of such a thing? Apparently, not me, despite offers. So, on the other side where a typical car would usually go, are our bikes. I have one, hubby has one (his takes up the most space), older tot has one, and younger tot has two – don’t ask. Therefore, hubby and I have to take turns parking in our 2.5 car garage – I know…kinda pathetic.

So, he gets to park his fancy smancy car in the garage when it’s hot, but as soon as the temperature drops to 60 in the mornings, he gets the boot. This is because he is cold tolerant and I am so very not – that’s why I live in Texas. On the flip side, I can handle the heat – I guess that is also why I’m the one that cooks. Ba dump bump. And, he really isn’t heat tolerant, so I’m not sure why he wants to live in Texas?
Any who, he argued for years that he deserved to park in the garage because he was the one with the expensive car, with the blah, blah, blah, whatever. While I, on the other hand, have a very practical car – a typical suburban mom car. It’s a Honda – how very mom of me. It’s a Pilot so that I can shuffle the Taylor Tots and their friends around – also very mom of me. AND, it’s silver – to hide the dirt – also very mom of me. And it looks like every other car in our suburban town. In fact, I often get mine confused with the others and go to the wrong frigging car. Yes, you would think that the gigantic (the only size they sell) stickers declaring my child’s name and favorite sport might be a hint, but alas, no, not so much.

Hubby, meanwhile, has the expensive car with the yadda yadda whatever. I just know that it’s cool and goes really fast. So, hubby had traded in his two-seater Porshe for a much more family friendly (well, it has 4 seats) Beemer, that, I found out, is faster than the Porshe that he had (this self-sacrifice thing is looking rather dubious). So, four little months after he sacrificed? his Porshe for the good of his family, I back out of the garage to take the kids to school, and take out the ENTIRE right side of his car with the left side of mine. It caused quite a bit of damage. Oops! (BTW – LOVE my insurance agent)

In my own defense, I was recovering from the flu or some such debilitating illness, and he really should’ve gotten out of bed to take the kids to school anyway. So, really, it’s all his fault. What’s so bad about it is that I did take out the ENTIRE right side of his car. Everyone asked, “Didn’t you feel yourself hitting his car?” Well, no, I didn’t. I felt my car go over the little hump in the garage that separates the garage floor from our driveway, and then, well, by the time I realized that I was taking out his car, I had already made it to the end. Did I say, oops?

So, you can see why my stomach always falls when I back out of the garage. And, even if I hadn’t hit a parked car, you have that whole side of the garage thing to worry about. Which, to be fair, several of my friends have had issues with – just look at their cars before they get them fixed. Sometimes it’s their side-view mirror, sometimes it’s the whole side of their car, sometimes, it’s forgetting to put it in park and rolling into the garage and taking out the little column thing separating the garages (see, at least, I didn’t do that!) So, clearly, this is an issue that builders should look into. Maybe it’s their fault?

Hubris in the "real world"

I was astounded at this woman’s hubris! A working mother emailed another volunteer and I to enlighten us on the ways of the “real world”. As if our world of stay-at-home moms and the teachers at our elementary school are make-believe.

I can assure her that there is nothing imaginary about cleaning up diarrhea, giving breathing treatments and medicine every four hours to two sick kids, and trying to recreate the boys’ school day so that they don’t get behind while baking bread, doing laundry and cleaning the house.

I can also assure her that there is nothing imaginary in a school teacher working a long day with 22 kids and then going home to grade papers. Even if I am not a school teacher, I can appreciate what they do. After all, I’m related to a few, and have been taught by several exceptional ones. I know that they feel that there is nothing imaginary about dealing with difficult children, or in some cases, their more difficult parents.

But the sheer arrogance of this woman to assume that no one else works in the “real world” is astounding. What does she think? That we all got our degrees and then stayed at home to pop out babies, cook and clean while filling our heads with daytime television?

Not that I’m knocking that route at all, or any route for that matter. But, almost every stay-at-home mom in this neighborhood left their careers to stay at home with their children. We understand what working in the “real world” is like thank you very much. And more importantly, we also know what it is like to stay at home. Us stay-at-home moms in this neighborhood have college degrees, nursing degrees, master’s degrees, and even a couple of doctorate degrees. A few of us are even former teachers.

Now, I had debated about sharing how this whole thing started because a few of those wonderful teachers at our school read my blog. But then I also know that they’ve heard it all before.

So, it all started with a simple email telling the parents in our children’s class that our grade level is providing snacks for the upcoming monthly staff meeting and asked if any of the parents would be interested in contributing anything from a list of items.

Instead of ignoring the email, or responding to our homeroom parent directly, this woman responded to the entire class telling us how shocked she was to receive this request. She asked, “What next, contributing to the teacher’s lunch fund?”

We responded by saying that we were sorry that she felt that way. And, that as she mentioned herself in the email, this is optional and not required. I also added that this has been done in the past and that our teachers work very hard. This is simply one way we choose to thank them.

Well, that pissed her off.

She wanted us to know that her child had gone to our school for the past few years and she had never received this request. (Quite possible, as every homeroom parent handles this differently – some provide the snacks themselves, while some others ask a few people directly.)

Then she gets on a roll to let us know that she works very hard too and doesn’t get snacks at her staff meetings. (Maybe she’s jealous?) She understands that our teachers work very hard too, but that her expectation is that they should have a potluck, or that their manager should provide something. (Does she really think the principal should provide snacks for more than 60 people at each meeting?) “Just a difference of opinion as someone who works in a real world environment.”

Can I just say, “Wow!”

I’d love to respond and tell her that maybe she can go to a “real” bookstore and find a “real” book on manners and etiquette and shove it up her “real” butt.

But that would be a waste of time. I can tell that this woman prefers to climb up on her cross and there isn’t anything that I can say that will make any difference at all. So, I’ll just be satisfied with sharing with you all instead.

Enjoy your hump day!